FUN IN LOUISVILLE, KY

Despite the fact those of us you see in the photo had our heads squashed between headsets or our eyes crossed reading composition after composition for 8 hours every day at the AP Reading in Spanish in Louisville, KY for the past week, we managed (with very little effort, really) to have an absolutely GREAT time.

Here's the secret to our fun---We hung out "a lo cubano!"...Despite the incredibly poignant and tragic story each one has to tell about leaving his / her beloved tropical paradise, these folks know how to live life to the fullest and laugh and dance and tell jokes and love / respect each other deeply.

Let's see...we ate in a Cuban restaurant twice....we sang and danced at the Cuban restaurant for most of both evenings...we went to Churchill Downs twice, the last time thinking we would watch history in the making if Big Brown won the Triple Crown...(he came in last, much to our chagrin, especially since we all had purchased Big Brown memorabilia just in case he made history) and, we even went to the Louisville Slugger Museum (surprisingly interesing) and the KY Arts & Craft Guild (quite nice).

Here's our parting group shot, taken just a few minutes before we all went our separate ways...OH! rumor has it that Ileana will celebrate her 50th birthday in March...The cubanos adoptivos might just have to go to Houston to help her celebrate!

Photo - Front Row---Yoli (Venezuela), Inés (Cuba) - - -Back Row --- Ignacio (Cuba), Ileana (Cuba), Ysidoro (Cuba), Tanyita y Ricardito (Cubanos adoptivos)

PEACE .....

(photo by Tanya, - Spring, 2008)

If you haven't checked out One Million Peace Signs lately, take a gander. (link on the right of the blog)...Some pretty neat photos..

SEASONAL DISCOMFORT

A.... AACCHHOOO! AACCHHOOO! AACCHHOOO!

L.....LOTS and LOTS of Kleenex piling up in the trash can beside the computer...

L.....LITTLE or no relief in sight....

E.....EXTRA doses of Rescue Remedy, Stinging Nettles, and Feverfew...

R.....RED, swollen eyes...

G.....GRASS, HAY, WEEDS...all things that produce offensive little pollens....

I......ITCHING eyes, ITCHING roof of the mouth, ITCHING ears, ITCHING throat...

E....EERGH !!!!

S.....Sneeze, snort, sniffle...sneeze, snort, sniffle... sneeze, sneeze...snort, sniffle...

It's so, so pleasant.....

MAJESTIC PEONIES

It's peony time here at The Farm, and it's a banner year for these majestic flowers. Last evening, I cut a bouquet and brought them in for the dining room table centerpiece, and this morning, they've filled out spectacularly.

Although many, many people talk about the sweet scent of the peonies, I, who pridesmyself with having a KEEN sense of smell, can never smell these flowers. I don't know why my olfactory sensors never pick up on peonies, but I don't smell a thing with them in the house.

I'm waiting for the deep, deep magenta bush to open, and once it does, I'll post a shot of it as well.

Also, there's more farm news to report since we have two new cats here (making a total of 8 felines). Brett's cats survived a 16 hour airplane ride from California and arrived at The Farm in the wee hours Saturday morning. We welcome Oscar and Felix to their new home. I'll post a few photos if they ever get up the courage to come out from under the couch long enough to pose.

Off to head outside....It's another glorious morning!!

I GOT "BUZZED" THIS AFTERNOON

After I finished watering the lower beds this afternoon where I had just planted some squash and eggplant, I was lost in thought about how I was going to repair several leaks in my garden hose, leaks that delayed the watering process for a good thirty minutes and soaked me in the process. When I got about half way up to the house, a loud, in fact a very loud and rather strong, bzzzzzzz interrupted my thoughts and engulfed me from every direction. At that very moment, I realized I was literally in the middle of a swarm of bees, millions of bees...so many bees that I could barely see in front of me, so many bees that I felt a bee breeze from all the flying taking place around me.

For a very brief moment, I was quite flattered with the thought that these little creatures might have considered me their "queen" for the afternoon, but that quickly passing thought transformed into a level of PANIC as I realized it appeared these frantic little insects with stingers looked like they wanted to land on ME !!!!!!! YIKES!!!

Time stood still. In a matter of no more than 3 seconds, I contemplated racing into the house (that would mean a swarm of bees inside the house!), screaming bloody murder (frightened bees many times STING!), and wondering if was going to be one of those people who wear bee beards at the local Honey Festival (I've never had any desire to wear bees!).

Every cell in my body rang the panic alarm, but in the back of my mind, I heard my own voice, telling the kids to be like a rock when the bees buzzed around them. So that's what I did; I stood absolutely still and pretended I was a huge (and petrified!!-no pun intended) rock that held no appeal whatsoever for the millions of bees buzzing around me.

As quickly as they came to check me out, they took in unison. I suppose the real queen flew by, and her admirers realized I was not the woman of their passion and devotion. THANK GOD!!!

My trembling legs got me to the house, where I promptly opened a bottle of wine and toasted to my good luck. I did venture out a few minutes later to see if I could locate the swarm, but the bee clan apparently decided to move on, and that was totally OK by me !!!!!

THRIFTING FINDS

I never thought I'd admit that I've become addicted to thrifting; however, my day is not complete unless I make a stop at Goodwill or Salvation Army. In the last couple of days, there have been some pretty phenomenal finds. See the photos!

Today's find is a "tangerine" version of this 1940's Roseville Freesia Vase (200-7) that I purchased from Goodwill for a wholloping $4.99 (a rather high price for me at Goodwill since I always try to stay underneath one dollar). I'd describe the color of mine as brown rather than tangerine, but all the literature lists the colors this vase was produced in as green, blue, and tangerine. I've done a bit of research and found the vase listed with prices from $65 to $175. Now, I'm not too inclined to purchase this sort of "art" for my house, but I'm growing in appreciation for the Art and Craft Movement of the early to mid-1900's. I'll probably hang on to this piece.

Dr. Tom actually found the second prize of the week at Salvation, and I think he paid about $2.00 for this McCoy Hyacinth vase that values $100 - $125 in the McCoy price list book. We hit Salvation Army about the time the sweet ladies who work there were shelving items from an older lady's house, and Tom grabbed this vase before it got out of the employee's hands. He gave it to me since he's more of a glass collector than pottery. (By the way, Dr. Tom is probably one of the most giving people I've ever known. He really represents the best of "non-attachment" to material things. And, he has a GREAT eye for beauty and beautiful objects.) I'll hang on to this find as well. I think it would be a great for Eliza as she sets up her hope chest.

One of my many summer goals is to get my Etsy shop up and running. I'm becoming overrun with thrifting treasures, and I love to put nice objects together artistically, whether they are of the same pattern or not. I understand mixing and matching vintage objects is quite the trend these days, so once I get started, I should pull in some extra cash. If not, then I'll just enjoy my finds here at The Farm.

Stay tuned.....

MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND - THINGS DONE

From his perch high above the farm in the dying weeping cherry tree, Clousseau oversaw the weekend's activities here at The Farm. What started as a list of 3,000 things to do has now dwindled down to 2,995 chores in waiting, but Eliza and I've had a great time working a little and playing a little each day.

The grass is mowed, and the compost has a new thick layer of grass clippings that'll turn into dirt in the next couple of years. All sorts of seeds got planted here and there, and the beginning tilling of a couple new beds, as well as two old ones, is well underway. Annie and Molly got their first bath of the season, and then promptly rolled in dirt and cow poop to top off their day at the Farm Spa. Several new plants are in the ground, giving the side Buddha garden the most completed look of anywhere on The Farm. I transplanted some datura and daisies in hope that the predicted afternoon rains will encourage them to take root. Most importantly, Eliza and I made a noticeable dent in the proliferation of weeds around the yard.


Foxglove is in bloom,

these pretty pink petunias caught my eye,

and the rhododendron's pretty spectacular.

Hands and feet in the dirt...Flowers in the ground....Three more weeks of school....I'm ready to play on the farm all day!!

NOW....

It's 2:23 PM, and I'm home for the weekend. Eliza's going to the high school graduation tonight and then out with friends, so I'm in for the duration...That feels really good!! I actually left the office today at noon, went to a couple of thrift stores with Tom S., and came on home.

The animals and I are here alone... Two cats are sleeping in chairs beside the computer. I have the window in the computer room open, and several birds and I are whistling back and forth to each other. It's quite flirtacious! One of my avian friends is a BobWhite, and it's easy to talk to him. Close to the window, a wren's chirping, and the cardinals, who are quite full of themselves at the moment, dominate the cacophony. Male cardinals may be some of the most "macho" guys I've ever witnessed!

I am in love with this moment...total solitude in the most unlonely of ways...Amazing music about without stereos or iPods...A gentle breeze... I can feel my father here with me now...He'd really enjoy sitting on the porch and soaking in the outdoors....I breathe deeply when I sense this level of connection with him...I've never loved him more.

I have three days at home, and in that time, I want to be outside as much as possible. My "to-do" list is at least two miles long, and I look forward to making a dent in no certain order; moving my body and being in touch with the land's most importantly on the agenda....

It will be one of those weekends when I probably won't go to town unless we run out of cat/dog food..one of those weekends when I'll feel my body at bit after I start tacking the chores, I'm sure...one of those weekends where I'll clear my head and be as me as me can be.....(and that means I might not shower for a day or two.....)...one of those weekends when I'll turn the compost and get really excited at the earthworms I find....("Those worms are good fishin' bait," Papa tells me...)...one of those weekends when I'll be happy, happy, happy!!

If I'm inside at all in the next three days, I want to write about what's coming together for a great family reunion (July 4, 2009) in the mountains near Grandma's, and I want to write about upcoming farm events that are majorly wonderful ones concerning our farm family....(Sneak preview...Dana's coming home and she's going to have a little tummy sprouting....Brett's coming home before heading to MN to be married....V'cation's just around the corner, and Joe will be home soon..... )

But for NOW, I'm of to change clothes and go hop on the tractor....It's just too pretty and glorious to be inside.

Namasté....

I NEED A THREE DAY WEEKEND

Little accomplished this weekend in terms of farm work....Rain and wind prevented planting tomato plants...Rain and wind prevented mowing already overgrown fields...Rain and wind prevented getting flower beds together...

So, this morning, Monday, when I'm off to work within the next 5 minutes to begin yet another week of work, it's sunny (although chilly) with no rain in the forecast...¡Caramba!

MORE FROM THE GARRISONS

(Note: As Kara and Craig Garrison send out their emails from Thailand, I'll continue to post them here on Namasté. Keep in mind they're involved in Christian relief and their faith may fall within the definition of evangelical initiative. Nonetheless, my experience in human rights work with Cuban political prisoners confirms for me that the power of projected goodness, whether that be defined as prayer / meditation / positive thoughts, etc. really is the most powerful and sustaining force in the lives of those who suffer on the scale that those in Myanmar do at this moment.......~Tanya~)

_______________________________________________

Dear Family and Friends,
It has taken a week to recover from the emotional fury that we have experienced. The pictures that were being sent to us along with reports of nationals who were able to penetrate the depths of the delta region were overwhelming to say the least. For several days I (Kara) felt unable to function, one day in particular was difficult and even the most menial task of making Jake's lunch was a mental challenge that I struggled with.

Many of you have written and told us of your prayers and the prayers of your Bible Studies and Churches. In the end, we want to tell you that we believe this to be the most effective thing that you can do. We honestly mean that. Obviously, many of you have agreed with this assessment and have shared with us the things you have prayed for...things that we ourselves have prayed. Of particular interest is Psalm 25, a psalm I have prayed over the country of Myanmar since the year before we left the States. Someone recently wrote and said that they were also praying this psalm over the country. We are declaring that the ancient cities, and ancient peoples lift up their heads and let the King of Glory come and usher in a season of justice upon the government and mercy upon the poor and oppressed of this nation.

Throughout history, God has been concerned about the plight of the poor and the abuses of power targeted at them, even among nations that are dedicated to worshipping other gods. We believe that this is true today.

While Craig and many other Americans–who are dedicated to the victims of the cyclone and the criminal lack of action by Burmese government–have been frustrated about "getting in and getting things done," they have not been deterred. The rebellious spirit that tends to run through our blood when we are incensed with injustice and forbidden to act, tends to be stirred up, and injects us with new adrenaline. New strategies are formed, new risks are taken, new alliances are made. While clear-cut paths to helping have been barred by nature, soldiers, and politics, many organizations have met together to strengthen networks, pool resources, and get goods into the delta region through courageous nationals.

IS THERE ANYTHING GOOD HAPPENING? Yes. While we admit that all the horror stories you have read or heard about are probably true AND worse, there is a positive issue arising. Individuals from the Christian community who have played it safe to avoid skirmishes with the government, have come forward to assist their people. One pastor came out of the country and announced, "I am tired of being afraid, and I am tired of running and hiding from my government! I want to help my people." He was loaded up and sent off with a team of nationals who were in agreement with him. People inside Myanmar have been immobilized by fear long enough and if their own government won't help the people these people will.

Tens of thousands of people in the delta region of Burma are still squatting in rising puddles with tarps draped over them, children are still crying from hunger, parents are still mourning their lost children, the government leaders are still lying to the world BUT there is a glimmer of hope where there was previously only increasing darkness. THANK YOU for the various ways you have personally helped. People have been writing and asking how to give and it has been a great privilege to channel your giving. Most of all, thank you for praying and for assuring us that you are praying... we feel this is the greatest advocacy we can provide ... asking people to pray not only for the survivors and their physical needs, but for a spiritual change in the nation.

If you are interested, this appears to be an informative article:
http://www.iht.com/articles/reuters/2008/05/17/asia/OUKWD-UK-MYANMAR-CYCLONE.php

With love and gratitude,

Craig, Kara and Kids

P.S. For those still wanting to know how to give with assurances that the money you give will go directly to help people on the ground, the organization Craig works with, Partners Relief & Development, has already sent in tens of thousands of dollars worth of cash and equipment to assist those caught in this crisis. We have people that we are working with directly on the ground (who we worked with before when we lived in Myanmar/Burma) who are getting all the necessary items to those in need. Additionally, the areas that this group on the ground can't reach as effectively (in the delta region) we are supplying nationals with resources to get crucial items to those desperate for food, water, shelter and medicine. Visit our website at http://www.partnersworld.org/ for more information on how to give.

CYCLONE IN MYANMAR (BURMA) HITS HOME

One of my former students, Craig Garrison (MHS '86) and his family have spent the last four years living first in Myanmaar and then in Thailand, working in humanitarian aid and relief for the thousands of misplaced people who are forced to leave Burma as a result of life under the totalitarian military junta there.

Yesterday, I got this email from Kara, Craig's wife, in response to a message I sent to them earlier this week:

Dear Tanya,

It's good to hear from you. Thanks for writing an encouraging note. Everyday the news gets worse here, and we are feeling in a trance. There is such terrible news that we have stopped sending out email for a few days. We are concerned that it's too hard to relate to, and overwhelming for all of you as well. The most overwhelming part for us is the inability to get help to the survivors to the degree that is needed. So few are being reached that need it the most. Not because there aren't willing volunteers, but because the Burmese government is trying to prevent aid.
Thanks for your update... Vermont in July will be wonderful! It brings a smile to our face just to think about it.

Love from all of us,
Kara

From Craig's mom I learned that he's made every effort to get into the country to assist, but the Burmese government refuses to let any humanitiarian relief inside the country. From my work with human rights issues in Cuba, I have some understanding of the frustration the Garrisons are encountering; however, the massive death toll and suffering of the people surpasses anything I've had to face with matters in Cuba.

Please hold these Craig, Kara, and their wonderful kids, Sara, Emilee, Katie, and Jacob, in your thoughts and prayers. They are perhaps the most amazing and loving family I've ever known.

SAMUEL'S GRADUATION

This past weekend in Boone was quite a celebration....Mother's Day with Mom, Grandma...Samuel's day in court

and..

GRADUATION !!!!

The photos tell the story....My mom cried throughout the entire ceremony...The rest of us snoozed as the football coach, who vowed not to give a football pep talk, did exactly that...

(prior to heading to campus...Samuel with his girlfriend, Megan...she's GREAT!)

(My sister, Myra, Sam, Megan, Samuel, in my father's robe, me, Petie, Eliza)

The actual shaking of the college president's hand...

And one happy graduate leaving the gymnasium!!!

(* Here's the court story: Samuel and his roomate went to a party at a friend's house downtown about two months ago. The jokers at the party had been drinking and had firecrackers. Samuel didn't take part in any of the hell-raising, but when the cops showed up, he was the one who acted responsibly, went to the door, and promptly got charged for resisting an officer and possession of pyrotechnics. As a result, he now has 35 hours of community service to work off at Goodwill. That's what you get for being a responsible person who's at the wrong place at the wrong time, I suppose!)

PHOTO OF THE DAY

If anyone's allergic to pine trees in the spring, here's why....

FARMER WILDER MAKES A DENT....

The beauty of the day inspired me to continue my garden preparation, and today, I readied the remainder of my beds for planting. I have two more large flower beds to take care of up around the house, but the veggie and dahlia beds down by the barn are cleared, tilled and ready for seeds. (I felt like a very efficient farmer when my mantis tiller started up after its "long winter nap" without any problem whatsoever--especially since I left gas in it over during its hibernation!!!)

Tomorrow, if the weather holds, I'll get greens, lettuce, spinach, and maybe some broccoli in the ground. And then, it won't be long until we'll be eating good, healthy, organic, veggies...Can't wait.
This double Virgo's always a happy camper when there's dirt under the finger nails!

(Note: I'm driving the tractor in the photo, and that's Mary Ann on the back. Not only are we very compatible office mates, but we're also pretty great field hands! Sometimes Mary Ann gets to drive our state of the art equipment.)

PURPLE / LAVENDER-YESTERDAY'S COLORS OF THE DAY

I spent yesterday, Derby Day, in Woodsfield with Dr. Tom at the annual party Robert Morris has in honor of paying off the mortgage on his house. Although the breeze was stiff and the rain heavy at time, I did mange to snap a few photos.

This incredible purple wisteria in full bloom had a delicate, sweet scent.

Wild larkspurs are one of my favorite spring flowers. I have some blooming in my front flower bed.

The yellow flowers popping out from the lilacs smelled as sweet as the lilacs.

OUTSIDE, AT LAST!

When I got home from work today, I was really tempted to take a nap and put off, once again, my initial efforts at tackling the chores that await my attention around the farm. Inspired by the warmth of the afternoon, the sweet scent of the Russian olive trees in bloom, and the industriousness of my new farmhand, Tim, as he chopped and waged war against a huge brush pile, I did, indeed, get off my duff , headed outside and cleaned out three of my deep beds in preparation for getting some seeds in the ground--hopefully this weekend. The dogs kept me company, and the white kittens played ATTACK at every handful of weeds I tossed their way. Before I knew it, I had two beds ready to till, and I was delighted to know I didn't expire in the process of pulling and tugging.

I feel good now...It was good to get outside and move my body. As I walked around the field with Annie and Molly before I came in, the bluettes, trillium, mayapples, and Solomon seal caught my eye. I realized winter really is pretty much gone....I can get out without freezing....It's time to open my heart and soak in the Earth.

It's been a heck of a spring, more emotionally than any other way....Today, I told myself what I always used to tell the kids.."It's too pretty to be indoors." I'm glad I listened to my own words today...I feel greatly refreshed...

Peace .....

CLEANING HOUSE

My plans to get outside this weekend and let the weeds know I'm really ready to take them on somehow just didn't materialize. Two sunny days provided many hours of opportunity, but the interior of the house screamed "CLEAN ME, PLEASSSSSEE!!"

There were all sorts of reasons to listen to the house's pleas:

~a rather obnoxious smell wafting from my closet...

~white cat hair all over the house (from two rambunctious kittens who leave a trail of snow-like fur wherever they go bouncing) that sticks to one's clothes and causes an invasion of sneeze-producing dust bunnies in every knook and cranny...

~ mounds of dirt all around from a month or longer without dusting....

~muddy cat and dog footprints that lend an interesting but gritty, irritating design on the floor...

~rapidly multiplying bathroom grunge that can no longer be overlooked...

The result: I spent the weekend cleaning the house, and the weeds grew another 6". Oh well...

NEWS UPDATE - GOOD NEWS FROM THE FARM

It seems there's been a whirlwind of strong energy here at The Farm this spring, some of which has been so life-changing that it's been a challenge to keep the heart light and happy.. We've managed, however, to still keep our eyes on what's good and beautiful and our hearts open....

RIght now, however, there are some REALLY, REALLY good events to report...Yippee! Here goes!...

Long time farm kid, house sitter, babysitter, and very special sister / daughter, Dana, is ....drum roll please...PREGNANT! She and James will become parents in December, and as the Universe would have it, her due date is December 25th, the same day Samuel was due to incarnate on the planet. I have a hunch this little one will arrive on or around his birthday, December 13th. Nonetheless, we'll have another special little Saggitarian in the farm family....My smile, since learning the good news, just gets bigger and bigger....

And just a couple of weeks from now, Samuel graduates (May 10th) from Appalachian State University with a degree in Journalism and a minor in Philosophy and Religion...My little boy is finishing college....It's so great to celebrate this moment in his life...His Papa would be so delighted to know Samuel will be wearing Papa's gown for the ceremony! I couldn't be a prouder mom!!!!!

And then, on June 5th in Duluth, MN, Brett and Betsy will tie the knot before heading to Oxford for the summer for six weeks where Betsy will begin her MA degree. From England, the two will head to Bulgaria for two years to teach in what sounds like an incredible school there. The Farm will become the extended temporary home for their cats, Felix and Oscar. (Eliza and I are already preparing for a feline adjustment period....cats take a while to get used to cats, you know.)

Lori, nanny extraordinaire for the Kruegers of Nickelback, returns to The Farm around the July 4th weekend for her class reunion and a week's visit. Get this...She'll more than likely be flying in from Switzerland, where the Kruegers will be summering with Shania Twain and family. Lori'll take a break from life in the fast lane with the rich and famous to come back to The Farm, see her friends, and perhaps turn a little compost down by the barn. Then, it's back to Europe for her. Can't wait to see her! (Notice the likeness of Lori and Eliza...sisters of different mothers..)



And, earlier this evening, I got a call from Mary Ann, my office mate, with the good news that her father, a career military man, is NOT going to be shipped out to Iraq immediately. The news she received the other day made it sound like he would be on the way to the war zone after a brief visit to some base in Virginia. But as luck would have it, some of his men didn't pass whatever entry exam they had to in order to be deployed, and he has to stay back with them. Thank you, flunkees!

Finally, our vacation plans have come together...Joe'll fly in from Utah in early July, and then he, Eliza, Samuel, and I will head north to Vermont, meet up with Bobbi and Isabella, and spend a week in Danville, VT, in a beautiful summer cottage owned by one of Bobbi's clients. There's a lake for canoeing, an organic farmer's market every day, and easy passage into Montreal. We're getting the passports ready!

Happiness abounds on many levels....Share the joy....It feels so, so good!

Namasté...

WHAT THE CAT DRUG IN

4:00 PM ~ April 22, 2008

Tanya sits at the computer, answering emails and pondering whether or not she'll make it outside this afternoon to work in the yard, take a walk, or whatever.....She looks over her shoulder to see what Cato, her curious, playful, loveable, and mischievous kitten, is up to as he

bounces around and tumbles head over heels in the far corner of the room to her left.

"Oh, how cute. I really love my silly white kittens. Look! He's attacking a striped bungee cord he's brought upstairs. He loves things that twist around, that he can carry all over the house and throw up in the air, " she says to herself.

Shortly thereafter, Tanya thinks, "Bungee cord? Hmmmmm....I don't have any around the house that small, and I sure don't have one that's striped on the top and solid on the bottom."

She turns around to check on Cato, only to find that the bungee cord is, in actually, a desperate, exhausted, petrifed, can't even think about slithering away, ready to meet his Maker.....

juvenile garter snake. Over the years, Tanya has picked up a lot of snakes here on the farm, but she's never, ever heard a little snake voice so gratefully and semi-consciously repeating, "Thank you....thank you, thank you, thank you...thank you...."

"Eliza!" Tanya calls. "Come see what the cat drug in!!!"

Eliza, who's taking her afternoon nap, jumps out of bed, horrified. "Mom, what's wrong? Is the house on fire? Are you OK? EEEEEEEKKKKK!!!!! You've got a snake in your hands!!!!!!" she screams in her sonambulous state, really not aware of where she is in time or space.

Tanya lovingly tells to go back to sleep and gently carries the seemingly lifeless snake outside.

When it realizes it's in the grass, all the little serpent can do is look up at Tanya, as if to say a " WHEW !!!!! I think I've just survived a near death experience." Then it slowly and painfully slithers away.

Meanwhile, Cato, the truly perplexed cat, continues to look for his stolen toy upstairs in the computer room.

The End

THE 1930'S

For some unknown reason or perhaps by divine orchestration, I have been absorbed by the Depression era lately. As the child of parents who were teenagers during that time, I've heard about the Depression all my life, but I've never really had an in-depth fascination with any particular moment in history since my obsession with dinosaurs when I was young.

Perhaps learning more about my parents' childhoods and looking at photo after photo of them around the Depression era have opened the door for my newfound fascination. Certainly Papa's passage has inspired me to find out all I can about his life at that time, and I'm beginning to ask my mom more and more about her recollections of those years as well.

Anyway, when friends recommended the HBO series, Carnavale, to me, I netflix-ed it as something worthy to watch during the winter months. I was immediately hooked, fascinated by the Dust Bowl period, the traveling circus, and the paranormal aspects of the series. Actually two stories interweave and ultimately come together in the second season, and without giving away too much information, I'll just say that there are very dark and haunting events that culminate in a powerful close to season two. I totally understand why a third season might have been too much for television viewers; this series deals with some pretty heady, heavy stuff, including a charismatic minister, Brother Justin, who is possessed by the devil and a young man, Ben Hawkins, who has the power of healing and is adopted by the circus show. The series just might even have been too much for non-mainstream TV; however, I thought Carnavale was engrossing, provocative, and fascinating.

In keeping with the roguish aspect of Carnavale, my lastest read has been Water for Elephants (Sara Gruen). Again, the book centers around a traveling big-top show as told in flashbacks from the show's vet who is now 90 and in a nursing home. It's as sordid at moments as Carnavale, but I couldn't put it down. Jacob Jankowski, a student in veterinary medicine at Cornell who is forced to leave school when both parents are unexpectedly killed in an accident, Marlena, the woman with whom he is deeply in love, her brutal husband, Auggie, Walter, one of the show's dwarf clowns, and Rosie, the elephant who understand Polish, keep popping in and out of my thoughts frequently since I finished the book.

And just this morning, Eliza and I watched Atonement, another 1930's period piece. Artfully crafted and composed, this movie (like Carnavale and Water for Elephants) is a story within a story, and the final scenes define the movie's title. I won't say too much more for those who haven't seen the movie, but it is well worth the watch. Kiera Knightly and James McAvoy rightfully deserve acclaim for their performances, as do the actresses who portray the younger sister, Briony. (I don't recall their names.)

If anyone has suggestions for a good cinematic or literary follow-up to these works, please leave a comment. I'd like to read and see more, and I'm totally up for suggestions.

I hope the sun's out wherever you are....Namasté

FORMER STUDENTS

Yesterday, I was checking Blogs of Note and found the blog of a former student who's been employed by Google for the last five years and who's now off on his next life adventure. Eric Case's blog connected me to Chuck Eesley's blog and Chuck's blog connected me to my beloved Meera's blog. I'm in 7th heaven!

I taught each of these amazing young people at Marietta High School for at least 3 - 4 years. Eric traveled to Spain with me on a tour we did in 1996, went to Miami University (Ohio), majored in the Classics and has trekked all over the world before ultimately landing at Google. Meera and Chuck were students in my Spanish IV class, perhaps the most memorable class I ever taught while at Marietta High. I joke when I say I "graduated" with them, for it was in the summer of 1998 that I was offered a position at the community college where I now teach. That graduating class, along with the class of 1986 (Bobbi, Joe, Craig's class), has produced some stellar and adventuresome artists and scholars--many, many amazing individuals!

Meera went to Berkeley after graduating, and Chuck attended Duke. Both have lived very fulfilling and enriching lives since--Meera spent two years in Uganda in the Peace Corps, and Chuck has been involved in cutting edge research at Duke and participated in meditation retreats all over the country. Now, Meera's back in graduate school at Berkeley working on an MBA in Non-Profit Management (I think), and Chuck's currently living in Cambridge as a Ph.D. student at MIT's Sloan School of Management studying technological innovation and entrepreneurship.

WOW! I hope the blog connection will further re-connect us and keep us up to date on one another's lives. The great joy for me, as I forever hold down the fort here at The Farm, is that they'll continue to check in with me whenever they come back to Marietta, for they will always be a hugely important part of my life.

Since I posted this earlier, I got an email from Chuck who also recommended another classmate's blog. Michael Sieburg, also a member of the famous Spanish V class members has also traveled all over the world and lived in Vietnam. I'm delighted to be able to add his blog here.

Hola to you all from the Señora! I am so honored to have taught you guys and all your peers!

WELCOME MRS. G TO NAMASTE'S BLOG ROLL

The blogging world is full of wonderful spaces where folks express their creativity, their sense of humor, their love of nature, their philosophical musings, etc. My office mate, Mary Ann, has an extensive list of creative folks' blogs on her site, and it is through her that I've come to be a huge fan of Mrs. G, blogger extraordinaire of Derfwad Manor.

There's a great video on Mrs. G's most recent post that I recommend to everyone. It's about cats and engineers. For anyone who lives cats and/or knows an engineer, it's especially appropriate. Check it out, and continue to explore Derfwad Manor. Mrs. G is sure to make you laugh!

Off to go outside and cut the grass....The day couldn't be more perfect!

I BELIEVE SPRING'S HERE TO STAY

The daffodils are waning...

the azaleas are blooming...


the magnolia flower petals are falling all over the sidewalks in town...


the tulips are fully open...


the hyacynths blooms are ever so fragrant...


the grapevines are budding...


the grass is up above my ankle...


the crabapple is about to burst forth into a bright pink...


the redbuds are out...


the dandelions have popped out all over the yard...


mother wren's sitting on her first clutch...


redwing blackbirds strut their stuff in the branches of the tree by the barn...


the dogs have fleas...


the cats are shedding profusely...


the peonies are growing like weeds...


the weeds have already taken over my garden plots....


butterflies are emerging...


moths flock to the lights on the back porch...


All signs point to SPRING (!) and warmer weather......Yippee!!

LETTERS TO A GRANDSON / GRANDDAUGHTER

From the time Samuel was about a month old until three or so years after Eliza was born ( a span of 9 years), Papa wrote letters, first to Samuel and then to both children, about his life, his memories, his thoughts, etc. All in all, I think we have nine volumes, and I'm in the process of transcribing them into electronic form so I can run off some copies for family members and friends. With the exception of sticking in a comma or two, capitalizing some names, and other minor changes, I'm leaving the manuscript just as Daddy wrote it as he sat at the kitchen table and typed away on his old manual Corona typewriter.

I'm not very far into the first volume, but already, I've laughed out loud as I've read along and typed myself. It's been a great way to feel him close to me and hear his voice as if he were telling me the mishaps and adventures out loud. I can hear his chuckle and see his ornery grin as I read about squirrels, fencing, hogs, and life back in the mountains. There will be war memories to come in the subsequent volumes, as well as Papa's thoughts on life.

I am totally absorbed in this so, so special gift Papa left for us.

Papa's beloved mountains

MISSING PAPA

I've always known waves of grief can consume one unexpectedly, and I've had enough experience in my life to know intense saddness can come and go at any given moment following the departure of a beloved one. Today I'm having one of those moments, and I'm having a hard time holding back the tears. I miss my Daddy.

As I was driving onto campus this morning, patches of luscious, bright, happy daffodils greeted me. Daddy and I always talked about what was happening in nature, and my immediate thought was to call him to share the incredible beauty of the morning. I can talk to Papa in my mind-- that's for sure. But today, I'd like to hear his voice. I'd like to hear his chuckle when I'd tell him about my kittens' antics as they played with some turkey feathers I tied onto one of his old fishing poles last night. I'd like to ask him why the crows never come when I use his crow call. (They ALWAYS came when he called them in. Do they know it's not his "voice" behind the calls? ) I'd like to hear "I love you, sweetheart" when we finished our conversation.

I am grateful, almost joyful, Daddy's no longer suffering in a body that had become consumed by Parkinson's Disease. I am grateful he is at peace. I am grateful we had so many good talks before his passage.

But today, I sure would like to hold his hand, hear his voice, fetch him a couple of Milky Ways, and rub his sweet bald head. I miss him so......

HOW'S YOUR DAY BEEN SO FAR, TANYA?

You can surmise from the photo.....

GREEN TARA, A BEAUTIFUL HINDU GODDESS, OFFERS THESE WORDS OF WISDOM...

Like the sun which emits countless rays,

compassion is the source of all inner

growth and positive action.

Its power can transform

ourselves and others

so that our lives become

radiant and light.

Tarthung Tulku

Gesture of Balance

RITE OF PASSAGE

My life continues to take on a new definition since my father's passing. When people ask me how I feel, I can only say that what I've experienced parallels giving birth...a powerful, amazing rite of passage that changes one's life immeasurably.

In list form, here are a few things I've experienced in the past three weeks....

~a deeper understanding of the amazing individual my father was....

~a new definition of "normal"--Papa just lives with me in another form now...

~huge gratitude for my life, my family, my friends...

~a heightened appreciation of my roots, of the importance of calling family together...

~a more defined understanding of surrender, of letting go in all aspects of my life...

~a lightness of heart...a new melody to my laughter....

~a deeper friendship with silence

~clarity in terms of things I want to do for myself and for others...

~psychic acuity and connections...

~a tangible understanding of being on the receiving end of prayer...

~blessing after blessing after blessing from all over the planet...

~a renewed comittment to making all my actions based in love, in the best interest of all...

~a renewed comittment to "do no harm" in every aspect of my life...

~ a lot, a lot of LOVE ...

I am so, so grateful for my life and my many blessings.....

Namasté......T.

THE FIRST & THE LAST

Probably taken in early spring of 1921, the photo below shows my grandmother holding my dad, and unless someone uncovers an earlier photo, I believe this is the first image we have of Papa. I suspect the photo was taken outside their home in Matney, NC, but I'll have to get that fact verified. Daddy was born in December, and I'd guess he's about 4-5 months old here. I've cropped the original to zero in a bit closer on their faces. I don't have any photos of Grandma as a young woman.

Some 87 years later, I took this last photo of Daddy on Christmas Day, 2007 in Grandma's living room. Her house is just up the hill from where I think the first photo was taken. We had just eaten Christmas dinner at Grandma's, and I caught Papa with his napkin in his hand.

BURYING PAPA

I've always known when the time came, I wanted to help prepare my parents for burial and shovel the dirt back over them as they returned to the Earth. I know this idea might seem quite odd to many people--- I totally understand how it could be.

But, historically, in our family, through many generations, women on both sides of my lineage have been called upon to dress the deceased and prepare them for internment. In that way, it comes pretty naturally to me to participate in burying loved ones.

Also, my dad and I buried animals, i.e., pets, critters from the wild, together quite a few times when I was young. He always took gentle care of the creatures he was returning to the Earth, and more than one time, I've seen a tear roll down his cheek as he began the process.

Additionally, here on The Farm, I've buried many, many of our farm animals, and I am always honored to do that. Our side woods, affectionately dubbed "Sherwood Forest" when Samuel was into Robin Hood, is the sacred resting ground for at least 30-40 animals, everyone from old Tornado and Gunner, the dogs Sam and I had when we were married to Kate and Botas, our old farm cats who passed on most recently. I go to the treehouse out in Sherwood Forest from time to time to meditate, and I sense real peace and love there...It is indeed sacred space.

So, when Daddy died, Myra and I began to gather photos to display in the funeral parlor, I had a grouse and crow feather which we placed in his jacket pocket, and we also sent him to the spirit world with a figurine of his bird dog in one side pocket and a wooden carved squirrel in another. Shortly before Myra and I closed the casket, Samuel, Eliza, Mom, Myra, and I snipped a piece of our hair to place between the feathers....It's a Native American tradition of mourning to cut one's hair, as well as a reminder to the spirit as it journeys that those of us who remain incarnate will always be with it. Myra also placed a cross-stitch piece she had made him by his side.

After the funeral service at his grave, Myra, the children, and I stayed, and as soon as I saw the shovels, I picked one up and began the process of covering my dad with the earth. Samuel participated, as well, and Myra and Eliza assisted along the way. It felt quite familiar to be working in the dirt. At peace in my heart, embraced by the mountains, cleansed by the chilly breeze, I felt very much in touch with Papa as I worked. He would have been proud; he would have understood why I was there, I know.

The dirt from his grave is still on my shoes....I don't plan on cleaning it off. I'm just going to let the grass and rain puddles be my cleansers.

BURYING PAPA

I realize what I'm about to write might startle some folks, but I've always known I wanted to actively participate in burying my parents. Additionally, I've contemplated what I wanted for them to take along into the world of spirit, into the Heavens. So, when the time came to say good-bye to Papa, my sister, Samuel, and Eliza and I included a few things that he would want to take along as he journeys into light and eternal love.

In his suit pocket, we placed a grouse and crow feather along with a snip of our hair. Mom allowed us to include a piece of her hair as well. In Native American tradition, women cut their hair short at the loss of a loved one and many times buried the locks with the deceased as a sign of eternal companionship.

Since Papa was an avid grouse and crow hunter in his younger days, it is most appropriate that those feathers travel with him in the spirit realm. Daddy always talked about the intelligence of those two birds; his respect for them were enormous, even if the crows did eat the corn kernals he planted and the grouse got away from him more than not.

In one of his suit pockets, Papa carries a small figurine of an English setter, his favorite dog in all the world. I've spent hours with him as he trained his beloved Bowse and Jane to do exactly what he needed them to do as he hunted for doves and grouse. In the other, he carries a carved wooden squirrel. Part of his morning ritual for the past couple of decades has been to throw some peanuts out on the back porch to the squirrels he had virtually tamed. As word spread in the animal kingdom around the neighborhood, crows and ravens became morning visitors as well. I would suppose Papa spent quite a chunk of change on food for his friends. He always worried that the neighbor's cats were going to catch one of them.

Myra, my sister, placed a cross-stitch piece she made for Daddy in the casket. I don't remember exactly what it said, but it honored him as a great father.

When the time came to close his casket, Myra and I left lipstick kisses on the top of his head and gently closed the lid. Later, after the service at this graveside, everyone left, and Samuel and I, along with the Townsend boys, Homer and Hubert, (how's that for some good mountain names), my cousins, Phil and Rob, shoveled the dirt on top of his coffin. Myra, my sister, and Eliza, assisted a bit too.

It gave me great peace to be able to bury my father. I've been with Daddy on more than one occasion when we buried a pet or an animal he found, and those experiences always were special ones that we shared together. I know he would be proud that all of us participated in returning him to the Earth.

I haven't cleaned the dirt from his grave off my shoes yet....I probably won't. It'll clean itself off with time.

MORE ABOUT PAPA

My father, Zebulon "Zeb" Vance Shook was born on December 1, 1920 in the Matney Community, just a couple of miles south of Banner Elk, NC. In time, his family would move back up the mountain to a small community named Balm, and from there, his parents and their growing brood of children would finally settle in Pigeon Roost, NC, at the family homeplace to care for my great grandparents.

We laughed quite a bit with the funeral home director as he chauffered us to the Shook Cemetary in Pigeon Roost. He was somewhat familiar with the area, but the shortcut to Papa's final resting place through Horsebottom into Pigeon Roost was new territory for him. The bottom line is that the Shooks are mountain folks. We come "up in the mountains," and we're stronger for it, I promise.

Daddy's family was not affluent by any means. This first photo had to be taken during the Depression. Missing are his three youngest siblings who were yet to be born. Papa, young teenage boy on the right, holds the baby at the time, my Uncle Bradley ( I think). I don't know the history of the photo, but the background sheds a bit of light on the land where Papa's family lived. I'm assuming the car belonged to my grandfather, who was the rural mail carrier and used it for his job, but I'll have to get that piece of info verified.

Prior to WWII, Daddy worked at a feed exchange store in Banner Elk, NC. After he returned from the war, he married my mother, and the two of them moved to Boone, NC, where Daddy finished his undergraduate and Master's degrees at Appalachian State Teachers College. The photo below is his college senior photo (I think).

Mom says she was stunned when Daddy announced his intention to study Library Science in graduate school. I suppose she had always thought he would choose a line of work that would allow him to be outside, in the natural world where he felt so at home. But, as a child, it was obvious to me early on that Papa loved being surrounded by books. I spent many mornings with him before school back in the "stacks" of the old library on campus. There, Papa would point out books he thought I would enjoy, as well as those he had intentionally purchased for their academic value.

Daddy eventually became the Acquisitions Librarian for Appalachian State Teachers College and witnessed the library's collections grow as the school became Appalachian State University. Under his guidance, he and his staff put together several valuable ethnic collections, and he started and oversaw the first Appalachian oral history project on campus. Papa always had a sense that where we were all from was a place richly steeped in tradition and wisdom, and he did his best to record interviews, catalog research, and organize collections for research on the area and Appalachia in general. He was proud to be from the mountains!

His own writings, "Letters to My Grandson" (and eventually to his grandchildren after Eliza's birth) record events in his life that he wanted his grandchildren to know. We read three of his stories as we celebrated his life down by his graveside. Those gathered laughed heartily, and a few there were the main characters in the plots we chose. It was indeed a wonderful way to have him there with us.

VISITATIONS

On Saturday afternoon before my father died later that night, Grandma Ruth (age 106) awoke from a nap. My Aunt Audrey said Grandma opened her eyes, looked around, and lifted her hands to the sky, like a little child does when he/she wants to get picked up. Then Grandma broke into a big smile, arms lifted all the while, saying, "Look!... The angels of the Lord. They're a' comin'. They're here right now! Jesus is a' callin'!" Naturally, my aunt thought Grandma was seeing the angels coming for her, but now we know she was seeing them as they came for Daddy.

In the last week of his life, Papa began to sense things around him that, on the physical plane, didn't seem to make sense. One night, he asked Pansy, his caretaker, to "get that woman out of his room." When Pansy assured him there was no one with him, he replied that a woman most certainly had been in the room with him and he wasn't going with her.

When Pansy told me about Papa's visitation, I knew in reason he was close to passage. Another woman whom Pansy cared for had recently died in the room across the house from Daddy, and it made total sense to me that Miss Laura's spirit would come to visit him. I told Pansy at the time the "woman" was Miss Laura's spirit. What I didn't vocalize was that I knew she was coming to let Daddy know it was OK for him to join her. At that moment, he wasn't ready. Shortly thereafter, however, he crossed on over to the other side.

My father and I never talked along the lines of "spirits", but the night before Eliza was born, he woke Mom up to tell her that a little girl had come to stand beside his bed and hold his hand. Four hours or so later, Eliza was born.

I've been around many passages, both human and animal, and I know there are many inexplicable things that occur around the time a transition takes place. Knowing that Grandma saw the angels and Papa saw a friend in his room assures me he was well escorted into the world of spirit, and for that, I am very thankful.

SIGNS

"Tanya, the good Lord sends us signs...He lets us know when he's a needin' someone to come be with him in Heaven. All we've got to do is look and listen. They let us know all's well, that the Lord waits fer all of us with love."

~Mrs. Bessie Mae Hicks, 79, to me on Friday after my dad's funeral on Tuesday.

My father was a man of the Earth and was always happiest when he was outdoors... hunting and fishing...gardening... playing with the kids in our neighborhood. He knew as much about life in the woods as any person I've ever known, and it's very understandable that as he approached his passage, signs came from nature to announce it to us.

Samuel called me on Thursday before Daddy died on Saturday to ask me about hawk energy. He had experienced two powerful encounters with hawks, both Red-tailed, in less than 48 hours. The first flew by him and perched in front of him in a tree in the middle of campus as he was on his way to class. Astounded, Samuel said the hawk never took his gaze away from him as he walked by. In fact, the hawk followed him as he went on, flying from tree to tree as Samuel passed by. The next morning at his house, when Samuel opened the blinds to let the morning light in, he said he was face to face with a huge hawk that was sitting in a tree right outside his bedroom window. Afraid it would fly away, Samuel stood still, and the two exchanged gazes for an extended period of time.

On Wednesday prior to Daddy's death, I was on the phone with Papa as I turned down the driveway to my house. In the distance, flying over the pine grove at the end of my side yard, I counted about 200 crows that were gathered in the trees. I've never seen that many crows gathered on the farm in the almost 30 years I've lived here. Their calls resonated through the car window such that Daddy heard them on the other end of the phone. He speculated the crows were after something else they considered a bother. I stopped the car and talked to him at length about what the crows were doing, and Papa was in awe that we were experiencing them together. It was an incredibly special moment, one which Daddy mentioned to me the next couple of days we talked. "Tanya, are the crows still 'a gatherin'?" he asked.

Knowing Papa and his connection nature, I firmly believe the hawks and crows came to let us know Papa would soon be "taking flight." I shared these stories with Mrs. Hicks, a wise, humble, hard-working mountain woman who's been a friend of the family for years, a woman who has 8 children, cleans houses to make a little money, still grows and cans all the food for her family, and lives without the conveniences many of us take for granted. In her sweet, soft voice, she said to me, "Yes, Tanya, those were the signs."

SWEET, PEACEFUL PASSAGE

As many of you already know, my father, Zeb Shook (Papa) entered the world of spirit early last Sunday morning, the morning of his 63rd anniversary to my mom. His passage was peaceful, very peaceful, and my mom and his brother, along with his beloved caretaker, were with him at the time. I had spoken to him about an hour earlier, and his last words to me were, "I love you, sweetheart." The strength and clarity in his voice were unlike I remember since he became ill over 30 years ago. It was my Daddy's real voice, the one I remember from childhood...the one that Parkinson's Disease had virtually erased over the years. I couldn't ask for a greater gift.

I write this from North Carolina, where my mom, sister, children and I are hanging together for a few days before we all go our separate ways. I have many, many good stories of these last few days to record, but I'll save them until my head clears and my body rests. It has been an amazing time...many love-packed moments.....many stories and moments of life in the mountains told and told again.

I repeat now the words my father always used as a blessing at our table...words that bring me close to him and his sweet, humble voice.....

I am thankful for this day and my many blessings......And I am grateful for the love of friends and family that sustain me every moment of every day.

Namaste....

HIS SMILE SAYS IT ALL...

Buddha just doesn't get too uptight when events in the Universe rock his world. There's a lot to be said about that.

Consider the fact that he lost his arms a good while back... Shortly after the first snowfall, he got uprooted from the security of the compost bin to total exposure in the flower bed....He couldn't see 5' in front of him yesterday when the snow was falling its hardest...The cats frequently poop and pee around him....From time to time, the wind blows so hard in his neighborhood he can hardly remain standing. And, as evidenced by the corrosion and cracks in his chubby little body, he "ain't no spring chicken."

Doesn't seem to phase him at all...This is one happy guy....I'll rub his sweet belly for us all!

Namasté.......

HAVING FUN..

I love it when flowers bloom in winter...(I am surrounded by blossoms all of a sudden here at The Farm--begonias, geraniums, amaryllis, a white potted azalea.).....I love to take a break from working at the computer and pull out the camera........I love knowing that spring will arrive much sooner than later....

(PS: I'm open for any constructive criticism regarding the photos....As I say, I'm in a real learning curve now, and I love playing around with the shots.)