MS. POTATO HEAD AND RUNNING MATE, MS. GNOME RETURN

After realizing she declared her candidacy for president about and year and a half before she really needed to, Ms. Potato Head along with her running mate, Ms. Gnome, held a news conference today to say "Hi, we're back!" and introduce their respective significant others to the public.

When someone asked her where she and Ms. Gnome had been since their premature announcement, Ms. PH replied,"We made a group decision to go to a tropical island, hang out all day on the beach, talk about a few details, and basically, stay on vacation until it was time to get serious about the upcoming election. Recently, when Mr. Gnome mentioned his water was heating up considerably in the tropical sun, we all agreed it was a good time to return to the area. The four of us are quite adept at consensus."

Mr. Potato Head, known by many as "Spud," stood proudly by his wife while Mr. Gnome, affectionately referred to as "Wrinkles" by Ms. Gnome, offered a friendly smile from his portable bath tub from which he never emerges. All four appeared very relaxed and happy, the result, no doubt, of 15 months of vacation.

In unexpected news, Ms. PH and Ms. Gnome., took advantage of the occasion to introduce their good friend and confidante, Mr. Gonk, who will assume the responsibility as their personal organizer for the duration of the election season.

Mr. Gonk, a self-confessed worrier, nervous sort, and coffee addict, brings a rather frenzied balance to the happy-go-lucky Ms. PH and unfailingly mellow Ms. Gnome. Reputed to lovingly but constantly badger his girlfriends into action, he also knows when it's time "to throw in the towel" when dealing with the unconventional political duo.

"We don't know what we'd do without him," the two women chimed in simultaneously.

Their respective spouses agreed. "Spud and I think the world of Gonk, and we're glad he's around to take care of details. I understand he just traded his latest Blackberry for an IPhone so he can keep the girls on task," Wrinkles added from his tub.

"Gonk's a really good guy and an efficient manager. Despite his frazzled look, he can mellow out when he hangs out with Wrinkles and me," Spud said while adjusting his fire-engine red construction hat.

After the PH's and Gnomes left the conference, Mr. Gonk told members of the press in attendance that he would keep them apprised of his candidates' schedule once they decided what they wanted to do next.

"I can assure you Ms. Potato Head and Ms. Gnome will bring an element of uniqueness and spontaneity to the upcoming election. Their 'We Embrace All' campaign theme has touched the heart of the entire planet. I expect them to spend a good time abroad as well as on the domestic campaign trail. However, I would caution the press and the voting public that one never knows what they've got planned from one moment to the next.," Gonk concluded.

Stay tuned......