Thursday, December 03, 2015


It's a classic gray winter day here at the farm - one of many we can expect until Spring decides to embrace us come March / April. While I enjoy the solitude winter brings, it's easy for this Virgo to get lost in her head during the months when I don't have my hands in the dirt, when I'm not outside most all day. It's also the first fall I haven't been in the classroom.  Thankfully I have a lot of time to myself. My task is to fill the hours with things I want to do....not all that difficult, thankfully.

But things have transpired lately that make accessing my joy difficult , specifically the level of killing in our country and abroad and serious illness that seem so prevalent these days. I tend to be a fixer - one who will work diligently to make people feel better. I intend to create moments that bring joy and peace to my space and those I love. When I realize I can't do anything about situations like in Paris and San Bernardino, I become anxious. When those I love fall seriously ill, I want to be the medicine that cures them.

I have to find a way to fix a lingering sense of futility. That's what I don't have figured out.

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